You're not a purple frog.

Hello everyone.  I wanted to write this after seeing some of my asmrtist friends getting down about the kinds of comments trolls (or just malicious people in general) can leave.  This entry is not just for asmrtists though---it's for anyone who has gotten down after being called names, or labeled by another person.

If you watched my Draw My Life video, you know that I grew up with a terrible person.  This person tried to do everything he could to break my soul (and my mother's as well).  One of the things he used to do was yell curses at me, and call me names.  It was hard for me to understand why someone would be so cruel---especially someone who I never harmed.  It's easy to take on feelings of guilt or inadequacy when someone is trying to groom you into feeling less than you're worth.  

I'd like to share a conversation I had with my mother that has always stuck with me. One day my mom sat with me when I was feeling down.  This is what transpired:

My mom asked, "What if he called you a purple frog?  Would you care?"  I said "no."  She asked "why?"  I said "Because I'm not a purple frog."  She said "So why do you care about anything else he says?  You know what you are.  He can't make you be anything else, unless you believe him."  

It can suck when people make it a point to try to get under your skin, or hurt you.  It is important to remember that these people, who have nothing constructive, helpful, or valuable to offer, don't deserve relevance.  They can say whatever they want---and sometimes they will---but only you can give them the power to matter to you.  Don't give them that.  You are who you are, and no one can turn you into something else.  

I know it's easier said than done, and there is a lot that we have to navigate with sometimes---especially if the hurtful things people say to us are rooted in our pasts.  It doesn't matter how old we get, scars stay with you.  At some point, it is my hope that you will be able to look at them, and instead of seeing an injury, see evidence of survival.  They're battle scars.  They're there to remind you that you made it.

You're not a purple frog---and you'll never be a purple frog, unless you give someone relevance they didn't earn, and power they don't deserve.  But you are a warrior.  You've made it this far, and you'll get even farther---because you can.   You have it in you.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.  Be safe.  I am thankful that you exist.